Do Thumb Rings Signal Bisexuality for Women?

Question:
I've heard that thumb rings are a way for a bisexual women to signal to the rest of the bisexual community that she swings both ways. Is this true? Are thumb rings an invitation for other bisexual women?


Answer:
It depends on the groups you hang out with, but as a general rule, no. Maybe at one time it did, but so many people wear thumb rings nowadays, that most of the time, it just means that the person wearing them just likes to accessorize. You might go to a club or a city where an informal code has been established, where certain accessories or articles of clothing are used as signals to the other people who are there, but that will be specific to that place or occasion. 


The signals can change from place to place and time to time, too. Remember in the 80's when an earring in the left ear meant a guy was gay? That quickly became a thing of the past when every rock star and celebrity started to wear them and the general population quickly followed suit. Mullets used to be a pretty good signal for lesbians in the 80's, too, until Nascar came around and every Billy Bob and their mother was sporting the stylish do. Then we had to resort to the skinny braids in our otherwise short hair and an ear cuff to put it out there...who knows what happened to that secret signal, but we don't miss that particular style one bit!


For a long time, gays and lesbians had to resort to subtle clues in order to identify one another. It was a safe way for them to find partners without having to out themselves to potentially dangerous people. Many of us still like the feeling of inclusion it brings when we display things like a rainbow sticker or a certain pendant. Feeling like an outsider in so many other aspects of our lives, it is a comfort when someone "in the know" recognizes our affiliation. But this isn't uncommon- Masons have their rings, football teams have their jerseys, affluent women have their Coach bags...it's everywhere you look.


Most of us would gladly discard the cool club signals we've had to use through the years in exchange for basic acceptance and the ability to live openly without fear of harassment, violence, or dirty looks.

Why are Peaches Softer than Nectarines?

Question:
Why are peaches softer than nectarines?


Answer:
Is this a trick question? We did say we'd answer anything, though, so we're glad you asked!


We were going to say that comparing nectarines to peaches is like comparing apples to oranges. But to our great surprise, it's not. Beyond the whole citrus versus non-citrus thing making apples and oranges a good contrasting metaphor, peaches and nectarines are almost the same thing. The difference is in a recessive gene that gives a peach the fuzz and the nectarine the smooth shaved feel.


Like most fruit, peaches and nectarines have several different varieties, some of which are softer or firmer than others. Different varieties have fruit that clings to the pit and others have fruit that is free of the pit, which is called freestone. The varieties that are freestone tend to be softer than the cling varieties.


Most of us get our fruit from the grocery store, and more grocery stores carry freestone peaches which tend to be softer than the cling peaches. Nectarines are more prone to blight and other crop hazards, and the cling varieties tend to be most hearty, so that's what the grocery stores tend to carry, hence the impression that peaches are softer than nectarines.


Something we found during our extensive and intensive research is that once the fruit is picked it no longer ripens. It's actually getting softer because the flesh is breaking down (ie- it is rotting). Keeping the fruit in the refrigerator will slow down this process.

Peach

Nectarine

(Images courtesy of Photobucket.com)

Why Do So Many Lesbians Have Tattoos?

Question:
Why do so many lesbians have tattoos? Is it a sign to attract other lesbians? Is it a self-destructive tendency?

Answer:
This is a tough question. Why does anyone get a tattoo? We think that there are probably just as many reasons for getting a tattoo as there are people with tattoos, and this article by the BBC seems to back us up. People get tattoos as acts of rebellion, to feel sexy, to display their individuality, to display their affiliations, to get back at an ex, to show devotion, to mark their adulthood, to mark their youth, and everything else in between.

Like you, though, we have noticed that a larger percentage of our gay and lesbian friends have tattoos than our straight friends and when we went online to check that out we found that, at least according to vanishingtattoo.com, indeed, gays and lesbians do have a higher instance of tattoo than their straight counterparts.

As for why gays seem to have a higher instance of having tattoos, our guess is that it may have a lot to do with the fact that we are already breaking the boundaries of common society by being gay, so it isn't that much more of a reach to break other norms. And when we do select a tattoo, often it is a going to be an image or symbol that announces our sexual orientation to others. That's not always the case, though. Between us, The Lesbos, have five tattoos and none of them are lesbian or gay symbols. Some of the more popular lesbian tattoos are rainbow anything, two female signs, nautical stars, and the labrys.

Two Female Symbols

Nautical Stars

Tattoo of a Labrys

(Photos courtesy of Photobucket.com)

RE: DADT - How Will the Military Integrate Gays and Straights?

Question:
RE: Gays serving openly in the military.  How do you feel the issue of housing, showering etc. would be met?  Women and men military members don't live or bath together for the obvious reason of sexual attraction.  If gays are integrated with straights in this setting it would be very uncomfortable for straights.  However, if gays are in these types of situations together it would be the same as having female and males together.  What's the answer?


Answer:
At the risk of sounding glib, the answer is that it is already happening. There are more gays in the military than you probably would guess. They are already sharing showers and barracks with the rest of the troops.


Contrary to some people's fears, most gays are not on the prowl to recruit straight people into our ranks and we are capable of keeping our work life separate from our social lives. If anything, serving openly will allow gays and straights to establish their boundaries more clearly. A gay guy or woman isn't likely to hit on a straight person if they know they aren't interested. Taking that mystique away will probably be a breath of fresh air for those who are constantly afraid of dropping the soap in the shower!

DADT Ruled Unconstitutional by Riverside CA Judge!

This is a follow up post to the August 16, 2010 post where we provided information on DADT.


Yesterday brought some awesome news!


U.S. District Judge Virginia Phillips ruled that the policy violates the First Amendment rights of gays and lesbians. As part of her ruling, Phillips made a statement that said that DADT doesn't support military readiness and, in fact, has a "direct and deleterious effect" on the armed services.


The San Diego Gay and Lesbian News has a wonderful detailed article explaining how the Log Cabin Republicans came to challenge the policy and the process that preceded the decision to strike DADT as unconstitutional.


The next step is for Judge Phillips to issue an order to stop the enforcement of the unconstitutional policy.


Our hope is that it won't take our government and military leaders too long to implement the changes needed to get rid of this terrible policy once and for all.

The Gay Hankie Code

No one asked this question, but we thought it was a fun one and we just thought we'd share this with you. For anyone who has ever been to a gay pride event or some gay bars and ever wondered about the bandannas. We snagged the below chart from GayCityUSA.com

There will be a quiz!

Happy Labor Day Weekend! Be safe!

The Lesbos

COLOR	WORN ON LEFT	WORN ON RIGHT
BLACK	heavy SM top	heavy SM bottom
GREY	bondage top	fit to be tied!
BLACK w/WHITE Check	safe sex top	safe sex bottom
GREY W/BLACK	light SM top	light SM bottom
GREY FLANNEL	owns a suit	likes men in suits
BLACK w/WHITE Stripe	likes black bottoms	likes black tops
CHARCOAL	latex fetish top	latex fetish bottom
BLACK VELVET	has/takes videos	will perform for the camera
BLUE, Light	wants head	cocksucker
BLUE, Robin's Egg	69er	anything but 69ing
BLUE, Medium	cop	copsucker
BLUE, Navy	fucker (top)	fuckee (bottom)
BLUE, Airforce	pilot/flight attendant	likes flyboys
BLUE, Light w/WHITE Stripe	sailor	lookin' for salty seamen
BLUE, Teal	cock & ball torturer	cock & ball torturee
RED	fist fucker	fist fuckee
RED w/WHITE Stripe	shaver	shavee
RED w/BLACK Stripe	furry bear	likes bears
MAROON	cuts	bleeds
RED, Dark	2-handed fister	2-handed fistee
PINK, Light	dildo fucker	dildo fuckee
PINK, Dark	tit torturer	tit torturee
MAUVE	into navel worshippers	has a navel fetish
FUSCHIA	spanker	spankee
MAGENTA	suck my pits	armpit freak
PURPLE	piercer	piercee
LAVENDER	likes drag queens	drag queen
YELLOW	pisser/WaterSports	piss freak
YELLOW, Pale	spits	drool crazy
MUSTARD	hung 8"+	wants 8"+
GOLD	two looking for one	one looking for two
YELLOW w/WHITE Stripe	likes Asian bottoms	likes Asian tops
GOLD LAME	likes muscleboy bottoms	likes muscleboy tops
ORANGE	anything anytime	nothing now (just cruising)
APRICOT	two tons o' fun	chubby chaser
CORAL	suck my toes	shrimper (sucks toes)
RUST	a cowboy	a cowboy's horse
GREEN, Kelly	hustler (for rent)	john (looking to buy)
GREEN, Hunter	daddy	orphan boy looking for daddy
OLIVE DRAB	military top	military bottom
GREEN, Lime	dines off tricks (food)	dinner plate (will buy dinner)
BEIGE	rimmer	rimmee
BROWN	scat top	scat bottom
BROWN LACE	uncut	likes uncut
BROWN SATIN	cut	likes cut
BROWN w/WHITE Stripe	likes latino bottoms	likes latino tops
WHITE	beat my meat (J/O)	I'll do us both (J/O)
HOLSTEIN	milker	milkee
CREAM	cums in condoms	sucks cum out of condoms
WHITE LACE	likes white bottoms	likes white tops
WHITE VELVET	voyeur (likes to watch)	will put on a show
BLUE, Light w/WHITE Dots	likes white suckers	likes to suck whites
BLUE, Light w/BLACK Dots	likes black suckers	likes to suck blacks
BLUE, Light w/BROWN Dots	likes latino suckers	likes to suck latinos
BLUE, Light w/YELLOW Dots	likes asian suckers	likes to suck asians
RED/WHITE GINGHAM	park sex top	park sex bottom
BROWN CORDUROY	headmaster	student
FUR	bestialist top	bestialist bottom
SILVER LAME	starfucker	celebrity
LEOPARD	has tattoos	likes tattoos
TAN	smokes cigars	likes cigars
TEDDY BEAR	cuddler	cuddlee
PAISLEY	wears boxer shorts	likes boxer shorts
UNION JACK	skinhead top	skinhead bottom
MOSQUITO NETTING	outdoor sex top	outdoor sex bottom
KEWPIE DOLL	chicken (under-aged)	chicken hawk (likes young adolescents)
DIRTY JOCKSTRAP	wears a dirty jock	sucks dirty jocks clean
DOILY	tearoom top (pours)	tearoom bottom (drinks)
ZIPLOC BAG	has drugs	looking for drugs
COCKTAIL NAPKIN	bartender	bar groupie
KLEENEX	stinks	sniffs
KEYS IN FRONT	has a car	looking for a ride
KEYS IN BACK	has a home	needs a place to stay
HOUNDSTOOTH	likes to nibble	willing to be bitten
CALICO	new in town	tourists welcome
TERRYCLOTH	bathhouse top	bathhouse bottom
WHITE w/MULTICOLOR Dots	hosting an orgy	looking for an orgy

A question about toys.

Question 

Okay here it goes. Do all same sex couples (female ones) use a strap on? Or do they connect without toys at all?

Answer

It is a mix. It all depends on the couple and what they are both comfortable with. Some couples don't use them at all (finding them offensive or unnecessary) while some use them exclusively. However, most couples use them some of the time and other times use different methods of enjoyment and pleasure. It all comes down to pleasing the person you are with within both of your own comfort zones. The great part about lesbian sex is that almost all the time both parties come away happy because they are both so concerned about pleasing each other, usually multiple times (that is easier when it just women). I could go into more detail but this is a non erotic blog. 

Is there really such a thing as "gaydar"?

Question:
Is there really such a thing as "gaydar"? What is it exactly?


Answer:
Absolutely! There is definitely such a thing as Gaydar, which is the ability for someone, gay or straight, to determine if someone is gay just by watching  them. When asked how gaydar works, most people would describe it as a "feeling" they get, more than specific cues the other person is giving off.


Gaydar is rarely 100% accurate, but there are some people who will claim that they have never been wrong. However, the more recent emergence of people known as metrosexuals has challenged the gaydar of the best of us. While people of any sexual orientation might have gaydar, it is usually found to be more accurate with gay people. Recently, studies have started to indicate that gay people have developed a more attuned attention to detail so that they can discern other gay people in a crowd, but we gays have known that all along! You kind of want to know that you're not gonna be whacked upside the head when you ask someone out, so you learn to figure out the signs.


Bonus knowledge for you word of the day fanatics. Gaydar is a portmanteau. What is a portmanteau, you ask? It is a word that is formed by two different words. Most of you are smart enough to figure out the two words that are used in Gaydar are Gay and Radar. We never heard the word portmanteau before, so we learned something, too!